2013, how did you get here so fast?  I cannot even remember if I made any resolutions last year so I am guessing I did not.  This year I wanted to focus on things I will try and do more of, and less of this coming year.  I want to limit the amount to just a few so that I can look back at this time next year and gage some sort of progress, or whether I should do these at all.  Alright, here goes:

1)  I want to become even more focused on the areas I already find myself working on or in.  My job at Bethel, my coaching at Hamline, the consulting and speaking I do from time to time and most of all my family and relationships.  Wow, that is a big resolution but really it is easy for me to make because I have already tried to start doing this in the past few years.  The more focused I have tried to be, the easier it is to have good results in those areas.  So, in 2013 I want to do more of the same, and try and become even more focused.

2)  A few years ago I decided I wanted to stop the expanding nature of my waistline and I am happy to report that I am still down around 30 lbs from 2 years ago.  This is a constant fight and all I can say is, yes I do exercise but it has 90% more to do with what I eat and little to do with the miles I run every week.  Working out is great, but eating is more essential.  This is still a challenge for me and I continue to work hard on eating until I am satisfied, and not until I am stuffed.  I am much better at this then a few years ago.  During this time I have also figured out (with the help of my wife) that onions are not the best for me and almost any fried or super spicy food.  I resolve to continue to work on this and even get better at what I eat and how I fuel my body.

3)  It was a challenging thing to do but this year I gave up coaching Junior Olympic volleyball at Minnesota Select.  I did this for seven seasons and met so many great fellow coaches, players and parents.  It was really hard to stop doing something that I love doing. But, I wanted to be all in, and time wise, I just needed that time to do some more of things in point #1.  I will miss Select, but know that someday I may get the chance to be back into that level of coaching.  I am so thankful for the opportunity that Scott and Alyssa gave me all those years ago.

4)  I resolve to nail my new job.  Recently I accepted a promotion at Bethel to lead all adult recruitment of students, everything but traditional undergrad.  This is a huge challenge and I want to nail it for my team, and the bosses who had faith in my ability to succeed.  I am so energized at this new opportunity that includes my old job and adds a lot of new job.

5)  I resolve to maybe apply to a PHD or EDD program in Education.  Yes, I am hedging here.  Let us see how this one goes.

6)  I resolve to love more and judge less.  What more needs to be said about this resolution?  Try it with me.

7)  I resolve to worry even less what people think about me.

8)  I resolve to invest more in future leaders, and help them succeed.  People did this for me, I need to continue to do this for the next generation.

That is it!  What are your resolutions?  What are you going to try and focus on this year?  Thanks for reading and Happy New Year!

When you start off on a journey, how do you know if you have done all the right preparation for the trip?  Did you prepare well?  So many times in life when I have prepared well, I do not even think about not preparing well because I am ready for what life throws at me.  But how many stories do I have where I did not prepare well and it came back to bite me?  Many.

When I am running it usually takes me about 3/4 of a mile to know if I have worn the right clothes on that run.  When it is warm it is easy to know this, unless I am overheating I usually picked the right outfit.  But, when it is cold, I need to start off feeling cool and be able to warm up just enough to feel comfortable but not hot.  If I have layered correctly it will put me in the sweet spot of that not hot not cold place I like to be as a runner.

The South Side Wind – it bites!

The other day I was out for a run and it was around 22 degrees outside.  Did I prepare well for this run?  Yes and No.  After the first 3/4 of a mile I was in great shape, felt warm, not hot or cold.  I continued along my winter running route (away from the cold north wind) and made my way through miles 2, 3, and 4 – when I hit the one part of my run that is on the south side of Lake Calhoun here in Minneapolis this is near the end of my run.  This part is wide open and just a wind tunnel.  It always is a tough place to be the recipient of a north wind.  The wind was blowing between 20 and 30 miles per hour and the wind was stinging my face.  For that quarter of a mile my running gear did not measure up and I was cold.  Even though I did some good preparation, I was not prepared for the high winds that kicked up.  I toughed it out and made it through but was happy to see the end of that part of the run.

The Snowy Climb on Sacajawea

A few years ago Danielle and I wanted to climb to the top of a mountain peak in Bozeman, Montana named “Sacajawea.”  This is a great hike deep in the woods outside of Bozeman and is a local favorite.  It was a beautiful sunny day in the end of July and probably was pushing 80 degrees.  We had shorts on and dri-fit shirts – we thought we were good to go. We started up the hike, through the woods and quickly gained a lot of vertical feet as we went up.  We soon realized that much of the trail above us was snow-covered – in July.  As we got closer to the snow, the temperature kept dropping to where we were really cold.  We were not prepared for the temperature to drop to the high 40′s because of the snowpack.  We trudged on, but after a while realized we were way to cold, and turned around.  I do not like to quit on a hike, but it was clear we needed to head back down.

Two different journeys, two different results.  One time, prepared really well with a few unforeseen obstacles, and another time totally unprepared.  The longer I am on this earth I realize the process of preparing well is so critical to success in any endeavor.  Yes, there are times for pushing ahead and taking a risk, but also there is much to be gained in preparing well.

Do you have a story of when you were prepared for something that came your way?

Do you have a story of when you were not prepared for something that came your way?

I so appreciate hearing from all of you!

Which path to take?  What will happen?  How can you improve your decision making?

Do you find yourself in those places from time to time where you need to figure out what to do?  How do you make life choices?

Do you follow someone else’s path?  Do you make your own?  What will it be?  How can you choose?

For part of my life I made decisions in a vacuum with my gut and did not think through them the way I should have, or sometimes thought about those things way too much.  Either way I would suggest is not the best way of trying to make an informed decision.

So what do I do now?  How do I process? Might any of these be helpful to you?  A few thoughts:

1)  Take the emotion out of the decision unless it is helpful to you – have a clear head when processing.

2)  Ask a few trusted advisors who know you well for their thoughts and opinions.

3)  Take time to sleep on your thoughts, if you have the time to process through the decision.  Sometimes things look different in the morning.

4)  List out pros and cons in your head, or better yet, on some form of paper or google document.

5)  Envision what saying yes to something looks like, and what no means.  Sometimes both can be good options depending on your situation.

6)  If it is job related, will you get a chance to do what you do best every day?  For a majority of the day?

7)  If you say yes, what does it commit you to?  Do you know what you are getting into?

8)  If it is time related and you are busy (who is not busy?), and you say yes, what are you saying no to in the rest of your life?  For every yes, there may be a no.

9)  Do you have any experience in your life that you can draw on to help inform the decision?  What has happend in your past that might help you decide?

10)  Ultimately have a clear head, and go with your gut – then have no regrets.

Decision making is something we do thousands of times of day, and we only think through a few of those decisions.  When you get to a place where you have one of those bigger decisions to make hopefully you can have some time to run through a few of those suggestions listed above.

A number of years ago I faced a time in my life where I had two paths that were obvious – one, to stay working at a job in politics, or two, go on to graduate school and move into a totally different field.  I chose to leave politics and go on to graduate school.  I regret absolutely nothing about that decision.  Yesterday I flew into San Diego for work and was going down an escalator at the airport.  I have been to San Diego a number of times for work and mostly have not thought much at all while traveling down that escalator.  But yesterday I did – I thought about the first time in 2001 when I came to San Diego for work and everything that has happened since then.  It was like the last decade flashed before my eyes while traveling down the escalator.  By the time I reached first floor I had a smile on my face thinking – I am so glad I made the decision I made to leave DC and head back to Minnesota.

Decisions… Decisions..

What are some of your suggestions for healthy decision making?

What do you do?  What is your process?

A really good friend of mine was going back and forth me recently in a series of text messages about receiving some feedback.  This feedback was from an unknown source – but it was directed at them.  I told them, as I have in the past, that I am not a fan of anonymous feedback, good or bad.  If someone is passionate about giving you their opinion then they should sign their name to it.  Stand behind your word I say!

After that exchange I wondered aloud to myself, is there anything in life I would do differently?  What would be the major things I would change?  I am not sure of the correlation between anonymous feedback and these thoughts, but it prompted me to think about the course of my life so far.  What has life taught me?  So much.

I like to think as I age I am a better learner of life lessons, and I think I am.  Does age = learning those lessons in an easier way?  Not sure.

Here are a few things I think I know and would do differently if I had to live life again:

1.  I would care a lot less about what other people think of me – (most of the time they are not thinking about me anyway)

2.  See #1

3.  I would be more generous and less selfish – giving and expecting nothing in return

4.  I would worry less about being employed and more about connecting my talents and passion to a calling

5.  I would spend even more time with people who invested in my life

6.  I would spend more time with my Dad, before he passed away

7.  I would spend more time with my friend Dave who passed away way before his time RIP bro..

8.  I would have passed on dating a few people (and maybe they would have passed on me )

9.  I would thank people who helped me more profusely

10.  I would try and nail every human interaction I had in a more positive way

Those are just a few.  I am sure we all have some.  The only thing I can do is live now – how can I look at that list and do better moving forward?  How can I live a life of no regrets?  How can we all do this?

What would be things you might do differently starting tomorrow based on reflections from your own life?  All we can do is start now.

It is up to you.

PS:  The picture above is from a golf hole I had the privilege of playing  on the island of Kauai, Hawaii a few years ago.  Before I hit my shot I took that picture and thought about how blessed my life is.  I am so thankful, so grateful, and far from perfect.

As a side note I did hit the green and if you look really closely you will see my ball.  That life lesson is that even a really average golfer can hit the green once in a while.

Have you ever wondered how you can achieve success?  I will assume that you have a personal definition of what success looks like for you, but in general, do you know how you can arrive at what you define as being successful?

What does one dictionary define as success?

suc·cess / noun

The favorable or prosperous termination of attempts or endeavors. The attainment of wealth, position, honors, or the like.  A successful  performance or achievement: The play was an instant success.  A person or thing that is successful: She was a great success on the talk show.

Almost all of those things have to do with gaining something, wealth, etc.  For me, success is about if I get a chance to do what I do best everyday and help other people along the way.  If people I come into contact with are successful, I feel like, I too, am successful.

So, yes, for me success is about achievement, but not just for myself.  In fact, I think, in order for me to be successful I cannot do that alone, and I need to do it with other people. Anytime I have had successes in life, other people helped me achieve.  My parents encouraged me in sports, drove me to swim meets and baseball games.  My teachers helped me learn about how to write well, and read fast.

I chose to start this post off with a picture of the White House I took a few years ago when I was in Washington, DC.  For some, becoming the President of the United States represents the pinnacle of success in our country.  It is a symbol of power and prestige.  It also ages whoever is the boss of that place considerably with the pressure that the office exerts on the office holder.

But I digress.  This post was supposed to focus on what is your greatest change of success?  My answer is it probably lies wherever you already are.  What is your current platform?  Do you have a job?  Do you have a volunteer group that you work with?  Whatever it is, where you are can usually help you achieve whatever you define as success.

I was greatly influenced, and continue to be, by one of my mentor’s Dr. Greg Bourgond.  Greg was my supervisor for a number of years and constantly reminded me to nail where I was.  Not only was this smart for him as a manager, it also helped me in that work setting.   Was I faithful with small things?  Was I present in the moment not wondering what would happen in the future?  Did I achieve some results in my department?  I would not have been able to do those things if I had not been focused on nailing that platform.  That platform, or your current platform, can help you build or lose credibility in the area you are in.  Do things well over and over again?  People will trust you.  They will give you more responsibility.

Another piece of this that is slightly parallel but tied and equally important is the fact that the people who you work or serve alongside are so important to your success.  Even when they might leave to go to another organization they will remember what it is like to serve or work with you.  They will tell people about you when people ask what it was like to work with you.  They may recommend you for future opportunities in their new zone.  Never ever forget the people you work with and how much they matter.  They are so important, make sure you treat them that way.

It is a small world.  I am reminded of this constantly.  Do not burn bridges.

Is my end goal for my own success to be the President of the United States?  No.

Is my end goal to impact the most people I can in a positive way that helps them succeed? Yes.

Paying attention to your current platform and nailing it on a daily basis from doing what you say you are going to do, and being faithful with small things will only increase your chance of success – however you define it.